As you are no doubt very well aware, I am a collector of very specific types of history. I’m proud to say I’m reasonably discriminate about the variety and sources of my collections which is why, in part; I’m comfortable sharing this knowledge with you. In a way, I trust you because I believe we hunger for answers to the same questions and it is those which have brought you here. If it were not true then I would venture to guess you wouldn’t be reading this now.
In a manner not so important at this moment, I’ve come into the possession of a collection which I would consider myself selfish if I didn’t share. I wager the best place to start is at the beginning so without further word, let’s get started.
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Dear Sarah,
I’m in love…again.
I know I said the last time was, well, the last time but its different now. He’s different and amazing and most importantly, normal!
I didn’t want to say anything to you because, you know, I might jinx it or something. Brendan and I have been dating for a while now and I think I’m falling in love with him but I don’t know how to handle the whole elephant in the room thing. I’ve had some pretty embarrassing moments since we’ve been dating and I don’t know how much longer I can keep our secret from him. I mean it might be better if he knew the truth instead of thinking he’s just dating a total freak… well, maybe not a TOTAL freak…
Well…anyway…
There was a day last week when the moon was waxing (which is what I should be doing this time of month), whew! My hair does some crazy shit when the full moon is on its way but this really pissed me off! Tuesday night I slept terribly; I tossed and turned all night. Then Wednesday morning, I hit the snooze button once or twice…or half a dozen times…
At any rate, I got up late and ran out the door without even brushing my hair which turned out to be a damned good thing because the big floppy mop on my head served well to cover the one big, freaky whisker that sprung up overnight right in the middle of my cheek.
I met Brendan for lunch and I am soooo grateful that he didn’t notice me getting my freak on. I would have died if he’d mentioned it! I probably wouldn’t have even noticed the hair myself, except Fay spilled ketchup on my arm. I know she did it on purpose; she was just trying to get Brendan alone so she could flirt with him. That bitch!
It was all dripping down between my fingers so I had to go wash it off in the bathroom and when I was at the sink, I flipped my hair back to keep it out of the water and there it was: a huge black whisker straight out like a freaky antenna in the center of my cheek! It was so big I had no trouble grasping it with my bare fingers but it took several tries to pull that tough mother out! Hurt like a bitch.
I’ll tell you what I need; I need a beastie who will tell me when my hair, fangs or whatever get out of line. Or, maybe I should just tell Brendan the truth. Yeah right! He’s so grounded, he’d never believe me. Or worse, he’d dump me!! I’m probably going to have to soon enough anyway. We’ve been dating for like forever and soon enough he’s going to want to get it on. I haven’t gone that far with any boy yet. I am afraid it’ll bring out the beast in me and I’ll probably give the whole game away. I’m going to have to either tell him or break up with him and I don’t want to do that!
Ok, I’ve made up my mind. I am going to tell him! Yeah… That’s what I’ll do. Now, how do I do that?!?!
Always thoughtful in your embrace, Shelly.
Well Shelly first you need to find out how he feels about you, in depth.
Then tell him the truth. And be prepared to answer 101 questions.
But then that is what I would hope for, total truth myself from a woman.